The loss of a loved one (human or animal) is always difficult, for most people, often the most difficult thing that we experience life. For some people the loss of a beloved animal is even more difficult than the loss of a human. This is often not understood by everyone around them which makes you feel even more lonely and sad. Our pets are ALWAYS around us and thus become so integrated in our day to day life and emotional life that the loss of the animal can be extremely heavy. Our whole daily routine shifts and so many tasks fall away which can bring isolation and loss of purpose.
Our pets love us unconditionally, wholeheartedly and if that love is lost, it hits the very heart and soul. Through this animals unconditional love, we drop our masks and are able to love animals differently than humans: much more uncomplicated, more honest and deeper because we do not feel the inhibitions that we have in loving humans. Not everyone is able to understand this and it is nice if you can get support with your grief.
Animals make it so easy to love them and so humans are often capable of deeper love towards animals.
When you have a good and deep relationship with your pet, you would want to guide its transition as good as possible as well. They do not live to be the age of a human, so the moment of parting from us is therefore inevitable.
How can I help you and your animal?
Through communication an animal can say if it wants euthanasia will or if it wants to let nature take its course. It can also indicate whether it wants to be buried or cremated.
When it wants to be buried they usually can indicate an exact place that is fully recognizable to the humans the animal lives with. The animal also gives messages to indicate the extent to which it is already in the transition phase.
Using Anaflora essences and Healing Touch treatments can bring ease to the transition and moment of death and can bring acceptance to human and animal both. Once you know that an animal is terminally ill, you can start assisting this transition phase. A stage that has great impact on human and animal. At the time of death I can energetically be with the animal to assist in letting go of the body and the earthly life. I do not have to be physically with the animal to be able to help, so this kind of assistance is done remote.
The guidance does not have to end here. After death the grieving process begins and again Anaflora essences and Healing Touch treatments are very effective therapies. Anaflora essences can be of great help to the animals and humans who stay behind. They will soften the grieving process and help in letting go, bringing acceptance and softening to the immense overwhelming grief and loss. It creates space to see and feel the departed animal in a positive, grateful and loving way.
Guilt is also very often a major part of the bereavement process, Anaflora essences however can help you release the guilt. We often think that we have not done enough, have done too little, too late, did not give enough attention during the last stages of life and so on. By taking Anaflora flower Essences like Transition, Bereavement of Return to Joy before, during and after the moment of death, this pain is immensely softened and the guilt and regret disappears.
Mostly you have an animal for life and that includes positive and negative (call it easy and difficult) and the greatest gift is to go through this last phase in positivity, love, respect and gratitude. This is very important for both human and animal and a large part in the healing process.
Loss will always hurt tremendously and it includes all kinds of emotions, but it important to release these emotions in proper dosage and at the right time so that you can remain strong enough to help the animal in his death and dying process. With this you will help yourself and the animal and it will be a mutual gift of respect, love and gratitude.
Everyone is capable of this kind of guidance if he or she wants to and certainly with help.
Around the death and dying process
If possible let the animal decide for itself where it wants to lie down and make it a sacred space by placing candles, favorite items like toys, photos etc around it. Let the animal lie on a favorite blanket or other beautiful blanket or pillow. Put flowers around it which afterwards may be buried or cremated with it. Talk to the animal about all the beloved animals that have already past and tell it they will be waiting and assist him in the process. Tell the animal to focus on the light it can see and feel. Be together with the animal as much as possible and let it feel and hear your love and enjoy every second you spend together in this way. Out of respect and gratitude for the animal and for yourself it is best if you replace your grief as much as possible with gratitude, respect and love. Tell the animal that it has your permission to die and that it must not hold on to life for you. Everyone has their own path in life and beyond and this process is included. Tell it that you will certainly miss it but that it does not have to worry about you. When you speak these words with the necessary genuine feelings, the dying process will be much easier and that is what ultimately everyone wants. Let everyone who you want to be there say his goodby to the animal. An animal often does no longer want to be physically touched during the dying process and you and everyone involved should respect that.
After the death and dying process
Show and handle the physical body of the deceased the utmost respect. From the time of death it can take up to three days for the soul to leave and let go of the body completely. Keep this in mind and create a quiet, peaceful and respectful space around the body. Sometimes death comes unannounced of so quickly that there was no time for ceremony. You can still create a loving ceremony with candles, written notes or anecdotes, poems, drawings and photos and let everyone (human and animal) say goodbye to the loved one. You can all sit around the animal and tell wonderful stories about all the odd and special moments you have had with the deceased loved one. The animal will love it and it will make his journey beyond much easier by easily letting go of earthly life knowing that it is loved and that everyone thinks of him in love and gratitude and wants him to recover from the disease and passing. You can have this loving ceremony around the death or during the funeral or cremation or both. Everyone should do what they are comfortable with and feels good in their heart. These are just suggestions to make a positive contribution to the process of death and bereavement. When you have your animal created you can take the ashes back right away and put it in the space where death occurred. Make it a beautiful altar with pictures and candles and drawings etc. On the burial site you can also create an alter by placing a burial stone, a beautiful tree, shrub or flowers. and picture or drawing of course.
You can have your pet buried (at home or at a cemetery) or cremated (individually or in a group). You can choose to keep the body as long as possible at home (1-3 days) so that everyone (deceased, humans and other animals) have the time to say goodbye individually. The physical body can then be collected or you yourself can transport it to the cemetery or the crematorium. Here you will have the opportunity to say goodbye and have a small ceremony. If your animal dies at the vet clinic, you can choose to have the animal taken home to have a quiet goodbye for everyone. You can also always ask your veterinarian if he or she will euthanize your animal at your home. Always talk to the employees at the cemetery or the crematorium what is possible in terms of ceremony and other wishes and don't hesitate to ask anything. For instance it is allowed to escort the body all the way to the crematory oven. You may bring and leave behind or keep all the precious items that surrounded the body at home.
Saying farewell is part of life, however painful it is. It is important though, to remember the precious life that this animal has led and how much love and joy it has unconditionally given to you. That is why it is so important to say goodbye in a supportive and loving way. It is a period of intense friendship and care in which you can express your love and gratitude and in which you can ensure that the transition can take place as easily as possible. Do you find it difficult to be able to do this on your own please contact me.
To me Death & Dying Assistance is one of the most fullfilling parts of my work!
